Thursday, July 21, 2011

muslim girl problems

this one random girl from NY on twitter tells us about muslim girl problems, and I can probably relate to most of them. These are my favorites:



MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
There is actually a Muslim women's group called the "The Obedient Wives Club" #feminismjustgotfcked #theObedientHouseWivesofSaudi #TVideas
15 hours ago

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
It's 1am and I feel like there is a jinn in my room and I can't sleep. #nonstopjinnproblem #canidateajinn #AyatulKursiallday
20 Jul

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Id love 2 reveal my identity 2 some ppl but I know how Muslims roll #everyonewillknow #mymomwillsomehowknow #theimamwilltalkaboutitatjummah
19 Jul

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
I was just asked to interpret the Quran at work. #takingArabicoffmyresume #imnotaMuftibro
19 Jul

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
apologized to someone nd got "alhamdulillah" as a response. #thehelldoesthatmean #amiforgivenornotbro #noumrahformeiguess
18 Jul

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
listening to lecture and the shaykh said: "Television can lead to murder and even sex" #um #sexisNOTasbadasmurder #idratherhavesex
16 Jul

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Explaining jinns 2 my white friend: "Muslim/non-Muslim beings from an alternate universe, made of fire and live in trees" #Isoundinsane #fck
14 Jul

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
I just tried a romper on..on top of my jeggings. #sadhijabifashionmoments #embarrassed #jeggingsisahorribleword
14 Jul

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Co-worker:'I love your dresses.Is there a special scarfie store you shop at? Can non-scarfies shop there?' #yesdumbassitscalledbloomingdales
28 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
My dad said not 2 talk politics on the phone bc our line is tapped #myfriendsonlytalkaboutmarriage #theCIAdoesntgiveashit #ibarelygiveashit
27 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
so..when can we expect muslim men 2 grow up enough to tell them we arent praying bc of our periods #aretheystupid #idontunderstand
27 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
If the Scream movies were about Muslims, we would have to rename it 'Ayatul Kursi' #ireciteitlike12timesaday #evenwheniseebugs
27 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Mslims always teach babies to say Allah. Thats cute until the baby yells Allah right @ takeoff. #itwasmyniece #every1gotscared #includingme
27 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Just tried to put a flower headband on top of my hijab #ilooklikeadumbass #MGP
26 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
when i tell ppl i wanna cut my hair or get a six pack,they always say "why? no one can see it" #ICANSEEIT #hijabisntanexcusetobeafatass
26 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
My iPhone always autocorrects 'hell' to 'he'll'. My iPhone doesn't believe in hell. #iphoneisatheist #havinganiphoneisharaam
26 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
my boss also thinks jummah is 3 hours long. And she probably thinks its held at the mall. #Ialwayscomebackwithshoppingbags
23 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
coworker told me id never get fired bc of my scarf and bein a diversity hire.Pretended i was offended #buthesright #idsuethem4hatingmuslims
23 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
My bro is playin scrabble with his jewish friend. His friend said "winner gets Palestine" #mybrothersucks #palestineisfcked #again
22 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
I think applying mascara on the train and holding a prada bag makes me look less suspicious and friendlier #thatswhyishop #fortheummah
22 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
i used to race against my siblings in salaat when we were younger #youknowyoudidittoo
21 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Black brothers give the most legit 'Salaam alaykums'. #peacebeuponyoutoobrother #wink
21 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
have u ever tried 2 do basic online research on Islam but end up on a pg about oral sex in marriage or somethin #itsweird #ohanditsnotharam
21 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
My dad always refers to all my nonmuslim friends by their ethnicity and/or size #theasianone #thewhiteone #thefatone
17 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
walked into a store to buy flip flops bc my feet hurt: walked out with 2 dresses,a shirt and 2 necklaces #MGP #IshopbcIcanthavesex #logic
17 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
"have you heard the hadith about girls and how they cant pluck their eyebrows?" #hadithsIpretendineverheard
16 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
We all remember the day when someone told us we shouldn't eat Lucky Charms and marshmallows bc there is pig in it. #wehatethatperson
15 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
"i almost had sex last nite but I didnt bc its haram.Everythin else we did was just makroo” #bestmuslimquotes #sendingmykidstoislamicschool
15 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
The truth is No1 evr walks in2 the restroom until u put ur foot in the sink. #whyihavenofriendsatwork #sprinkleaway #muslimgrlANDboyproblems
15 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
If u are getting mugged or attacked,just start screaming Allahu Akhbar with confidence #eventhugsarescaredofterrorists #muslimgirlsolution
14 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
my cousin got yelled at by her parents because she does not know how to iron and cook properly #shesaneurosurgeon
12 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
my sister is waiting for people to RSVP to her wedding for a final headcount... #shessostupid #muslimsneverRSVP
12 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Muslim Girl Must-Haves:Eyeliner,drama,virginity,accessories, an ex who denies ever dating u,guilt issues,at least 3 ppl talkin shit about u
7 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Muslim boys have no game. This exempts black brothers. #canibyobeyonce #mgp
4 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Gorg weather out. Time to hit the beach with my Muslim bathing suit: jeans rolled slightly above ankles. #burkinisr2expensive #recessionsuck
4 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
hate tryng on gorgeously stupid things at the mall that I swear I can make halaal.I can't. #ilietomyselftoomuch #idbethefreshestwhitegirltho
3 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
why is jumma always a little awkward. and am i allowed to do some light stretches during the khutbah? #mymusclesgetstiff
3 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
Had a Marilyn Monroe moment where dress flew up.Almost freaked out but then realized I was wearing 4 pants and 5 shirts #modesty4lyffeee
3 Jun

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
i've spent hours debating whether or not its morally sound for me to wear leggings and tights #imnotevenkidding #prettysureitdoesntmatter
2 Jun
»

MslimGrlProblem Muslim Girl
To the Muslim community..success can only be defined by a ring on my finger and a baby in my belly.#idontwantstretchmarks #imsmarterthanyou
2 Jun

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